Now that school is winding down and I have had the opportunity to spend some much needed time with Dante and Isabelle, I am awe struck by how each of them are molding into unique personalities. They are both so different in how they approach their relationship with the world, that sometimes I can hardly believe they were raised by the same set of parents, in the same house.
Dante is my little 7 year old going on 80 year old. He is the most self-sufficient, wise-beyone-his-years little man. On school days (and weekends for that matter), he gets up early. He takes his own showers, dresses himself. At night, without prompting, Dante does all of his homework (in fact, if he can't get to his homework for some reason, he gets super anxious.) He's in bed by 8:30 (again, without prompting). His heart is soft. He is kind, caring, and as down to earth as a person could possibly be. He is a gentle soul (in fact, we once put him in Karate and he hated it so much-- an organized sport devoted to beating each other up just wasn't up his alley). When he grows up he is torn between becoming president of the United States, a teacher, or a theme park designer. He loves routine and gets anxious when it's broken. Dante is also very shy in new situations. He is infatuated with Abraham Lincoln. He is curious about the world. He asks questions, takes in information constantly, analyzes everything. He is obsessed with game shows (loves Family Feud-- we have several on DVR and he tunes in nightly). He is an extremely talented reader and he loves school. He amazes me everyday. Everyday. When I think of who Dante may be in 20 years, I imagine somehow he is changing the world...in a very quiet, behind the scenes way.
Isabelle is more of my free spirit and she's as feisty as they come. She's not at the least shy . When she grows up, she wants to be an Elf (I'm not kidding). For her last birthday, we had a Christmas party (her birthday is in April). If you make her mad, she will get right in your face and tell you about it. She laughs with more intensity than anyone I know. Isabelle loves stuffed puppies and has a collection of over 30-each with a name she so thoughtfully gives each one (there's Purple Eye, Pricilla, Gracie, and so on). She loves make-up, like most little girls, but will just as quickly sock you in your face with those perfectly manicured nails like any boy on the block. She openly farts and is not ashamed of it (as a mother, I'm not sure this is my favorite of Isabelle's traits, but it so clearly speaks to who she is that I couldn't leave it out). She's tough as nails! She recently had her tonsils and adenoids out, along with tubes put in her ears and she didn't cry once. I thought the experience would traumatize her from doctors (because prior to this, she LOVED going to the doctor). But, it had the opposite effect. She regularly asks me to go back to the hospital, because despite having probably the most pain she's experienced in her 5 years of life, she loved the stuffed dogs, flowers and balloons that came of it. However, for as feisty as she is, she will melt your heart in an instant. She is the most nurturing and sweet little girl when the time calls for it. I don't worry about my Isabelle's future...she's the perfect combination of grit and girl, and I know she's going to take on the world with perfect ease.
They are so different in personality and often I am convinced that Lil' Dante has a stronger show of my DNA in his personality while Isabelle is all her daddy. However, for as unique as they are in their ways...they come together as a perfect match in heart. As a mother, it brings me perfect joy to watch them become individuals in this world...my little Abraham Lincoln and my little Elf. Life just hasn't been the same since they came along. Everyday, I learn something new about the world through each of their unique perspectives. Whether Dante is analyzing a situation and developing a new solution or Isabelle is taking that same situation and finding a pocket of humor in it, their little voices are constantly bringing to light some new way of seeing life. I suppose that is one of he beautiful things about raising children, you get to step outside of your boxed perspective and open up a whole new world through their eyes.
I don't know that today's blog served any special function or delivered any special message beyond paying homage to my two children. But, if I hope it inspires anything in the mommies and daddies reading this, it is to step back and appreciate the individuals your children are becoming. At their base, my children are definitely molded by the mine and Dante's candle wax, but their flame is all their own...
Burn forever bright in this world Little Dante and Isabelle. I know your flames light up my heart everyday.
Hi Mary, just wanted to give you some feedback on your great post. Coming from someone in your peer group, a classmate, and fellow parent, I am impressed by your insight. I have met and heard of many parents who put in the minimum (or less) amount of effort into raising their children. The end result is that they fail to know their own kids and also have to deal with their atrocious behavior,mediocre achievements and minimal life fulfillment. It’s refreshing to read about parents that are doing so well and the minute details about their children that confirm it. The expression that comes to mind is: with children, you get what you give. You have given them the attention, nurturing, and structure they need and they have flourished. You are right about their futures, they have a lot of big, good things in store.
ReplyDeleteI find myself reading books and articles on parenting on a nearly constant basis. So often, it’s hard to connect to the statistics and examples, hard to know what kind of person is writing the piece, and even harder to really know what the children discussed are like. Your post is the opposite of that, it’s a window into the world of two parents that I know, two parents that live and work in the same town as I do. With so many examples of the the outcome of poor parenting to groan about (encountered at work almost daily), I am so pleased to get to read the innermost thoughts of a parent that sets a high standard for themselves and then follows through.
Thanks for the inspiration.